the world ended over a jacket!

This is NOT a good week.  Every night is a major meltdown with Nash because of being pulled out of class too much.

I am at my wits end...swear!

This morning....things seemed to be OK until Nash asked where his jacket was.  Not thinking it was a big deal...I said oh, it's in the wash.  I will move it to the dryer and it will be ready when its time to go to school.

He pulled his jacket out of the dryer claiming that it would get ruined in the dryer.  His clothes can't dry.  Oh my...was there drama.  So much so that I had to change clothes a couple of times.  Violence and spitting and hitting.

I have had to call for help 3 times now...today was a call. My behavior therapist.....I say mine because well...she is supposed to be training Hubby and I in how to deal with Nash.  But, this week...we are thinking she is going to have to be introduced to Nash.

Anyway...there was hitting, kicking, spitting, name calling....and this was all towards me. 

It was cold outside and I didn't want him wearing a wet jacket.

But, I got to the point where I just wanted it to end!  I wanted it over.  Get OUT!  GO TO SCHOOL!  WEAR THE FUCKING WET JACKET.

So, we left the house 20 minutes early...in a wet jacket.  Because usually, the ride seems to calm him down. 

Yes, he was calming down...but still telling me how much he hates me.  Mom, I don't like you...please move away.  Mom, I hate you.  Mom, never talk to me again...I hate you.  I am on my own...I don't want you around.

We got to school...he says very loudly...I don't like you Mom go away.  I say, then fine....get yourself to school...be gone.  You are on your own buddy!  Then I get Mom...you have to walk me to class.  But, I won't hold your hand...I don't like you.

I get him on the campus...he runs off with his buddy's and I am in tears.

I know it's not personal...this is the business of autism.  But...business hurts.

I am sad.  I am scared.  I never dreamed this would be my life.  And yet...here I am.

Stay tuned!

Tammy